Sunday, August 22, 2010

Sometimes I wonder if I'm ever going to make it. If I'm ever going to be thin.

Back from vacation, I gained 5lbs. I fight with my boyfriend and I binge binge binge for 4 days, and today I spend it binging and purging (several different ways).

And I'm still fat. Fatty McFatterson. It's getting to the point that every time I take food out to eat I start calling myself fat out loud. Luckily I haven't done it in front of others yet, but it's been close.

It just seems so pointless. I'm never going to be thin. I'm doomed to be a fat pathetic nobody for the rest of my life. Which is an overwhelming thought in and of itself. The rest of my life. It seems so long and so short at the same time.

Life seems like a really long time to spend poised over the porcelain god.


  1. Hang in always seems to be just around the corner that never seems to come, but I highly doubt you are a fat, pathetic nobody. It's funny you call yourself Fatty McFatterson, I call myself Fatty McFatfat! Much love and happiness!

  2. Everything for me is a Mc something. My grandmas cat is Fluffy McButt. I just called myself Mr. Gelantinous McAss while I showered. I think it's some kind of weird pathology.